So anytime I’m having a dark moment, I tell myself that love never dies. Just feel love. It’s one of those things I’ll never, ever forget the rest of my life. I told Glennon Doyle how I’m constantly searching for meaning in 2020, and she said, ‘Beth, you need to stop thinking so big and just go get a glass of water.’ Honestly, I felt like she freed me from the chains of anxiety with that advice. When I start worrying about what the point of all of this is, I need to stop trying to find the spiritual answer and just go drink a glass of water!
Can you trace your anxiety back to a certain point in your life when you were younger?
I’ve always been an anxious kid. I was always scared. For as long as I can remember, at night I was always scared of break-ins or kidnappings. And for as long as I can remember, I was always, always, scared of not being good enough. It was the perfectionism voice. Especially when I got Two Broke Girls. I felt so much gratitude to the point that I felt this overwhelming anxiety.
At the beginning of Two Broke Girls, I got this skin virus all over my body from deep-rooted stress, which led me to find horses and mediation. Horses only respond to authenticity because they are prey animals, so when you’re authentic and true to who you are, that’s the key. Once I understood that, it empowered me to know I would be enough no matter what. If I missed a line in one take, it would be okay, we could do it again. Once I was able to deal with my need for perfectionism, it really helped my panic attacks.
What else helps alleviate your anxiety?
Cold-plunging in the ocean a few times a week! I’ll leave my house at 5:30 A.M., get there at 6, swim around a little bit—cold plunge—no wetsuit. I really found that cold showers do the same thing. At the end of a warm shower, I will turn the knob to cold for two minutes. There’s a book I read called “Blue Mind,” and it’s about the healing power of water because most of our body is water. At first I could only do 15, 20 seconds of cold water in the shower because it’s something you have to work your mind up to. Now I actually put on Talking Heads and dance for two minutes in the cold at the end of a warm shower.
You recently said that Sunday is your favorite day of the week, but a lot of people get anxiety because of the work week ahead. What’s your secret?
Rituals are really important. You can designate it to any day, but I think it’s best to do it on Sundays so you look forward to it. First, I start the day by allowing myself to have a sugary breakfast, whether it be pancakes, cinnamon buns, or a blueberry crumble. Make it a treat. I also get the hard copy of The New York Times. The rest of the week I read it online, but I love having it in my hands on a Sunday. I read every page while I play records and my husband and I snuggle. I’ll also make tea, and then do the Sunday crossword, which I still do on the app because I’m not that good yet. And then I usually spend the afternoon with my horse. I don’t put any pressure on myself. I also don’t read anything for work if I can help it.
How do you end your day?
I love baths. That’s one of my favorite self-care things. I put in epsom salts. I’ll also go get herbs from my garden and put lavender, basil, etc. in the bath. I really feel like it grounds the bath and makes me feel super rejuvenated along with the salts.
Speaking of gardening, I noticed on Instagram you have a beautiful garden journal. How does journaling about the garden help you relax?
Yes, I got it on Etsy! Etsy is my go-to for everything…banjo, garden, journals, horse stuff. It’s the best. Two days into the pandemic I got my first plant. I’ve really always been a brown-thumb, but I started gardening because it’s touching the earth and making me feel like the plants are okay so we’re gonna be okay, kind of a thing. And I really wanted to document the journey so I could learn more about what was working. I still kill all the vegetables, but my flowers have thrived. I think I’m a flower-garden gal, which really isn’t the cool way to be since I feel like everybody else is doing vegetables, but I gotta say, I’m really into the flowers! I have beautiful sunflowers that are growing right now that I’m obsessed with and they make me so happy!
What else makes you smile right now?
I just got this Dolly Parton phone case that’s her as a saint. I met Dolly once, and it was the most hilarious encounter, which I tell on my podcast when I interview Brandi Carlile. Dolly is such a big part of the podcast, actually. She’s my hero, so there’s a Dolly question each episode. I need her to come on Harmonics, I just love her so much.
What’s your favorite Dolly Parton quote or saying?
“Tumble out of bed and stumble the kitchen, pour myself a cup of ambition.” That’s pretty good. “I see the light of the clear blue morning” is obviously the one that gets me through the hard times. “The sun’ll always come up…there’s always gonna be another morning…the higher the hair the closer to God.” She’s just the best.
This interview has been edited and condensed for length and clarity.
Jessica Radloff is the Glamour West Coast editor. You can follow her on Instagram at @jessicaradloff14.