There have been plenty of stories about controlling brides this year—tales relayed back to forums by wedding party members and wedding guests who need a place to vent (and gather some support, or answers). Some highlights? The bride who kicked a guest of her wedding…for wearing a patterned dress she thought was too white. Or, there was the bride who fired her bridesmaid over email. Granted, weddings can be a super-stressful time, especially if the bride-to-be is carrying an outsized share of planning it, but civility is still alive in 2019! Still, we don’t usually hear from the brides themselves—that is, until one bride reportedly posted in a mom’s forum (the post is now deleted) and, according to Fox News, asked if she could fire her maid of honor because of her baby weight.
“So my friend who is my maid of honor in my wedding recently gave birth and she hasn’t lost the baby weight,” the anonymous bride started her post, according to Fox News. Apparently it had been three weeks since her friend had the baby, and “she still looks pregnant.”
It was another three weeks until the bride’s wedding, she reportedly wrote, but she wasn’t “confident” her maid of honor would lose the weight by then.
“She may not even fit her dress. I refuse to have it altered again,” she continued. “It was already altered multiple times for her and she said she’d fit into it.” The bride then asks forum users if it would be “wrong” to find another maid of honor, adding she had “someone in mind” already.
“She said she has a back up dress and I’m saying hell no to that,” the bride finished. “I’m not fat shaming but come on. My wedding is only one day and I’m not having it ruined by her or her baby weight.”
Naturally, people had a lot of thoughts about the bride’s ask.
“Does she not realize what the body goes through in order to hold another human? It takes much longer than 3 weeks…” one pointed out, according to Fox.
“This bride is an idiot. You don’t just drop postpartum weight within a few weeks of giving birth. Sometimes it takes months,” another reportedly wrote.
“What kind of shallow person is this? If your friend is a good enough friend to be your [maid of honor], then YOU ought to be a good enough friend to care more about them than how they look in a picture,” another commenter said, per Fox.
It does take months to lose the weight from pregnancy—extra pounds are part of what’s involved in creating and delivering a new life. Although it sometimes seems like celebrities are shedding points in a matter of weeks, everyone’s bodies are different, and the level of access they have to trainers, nutritionists, and doctors is quite a bit more than most of us mortals enjoy. In the meantime, a general reminder: Body-shaming new moms (or anyone else, for that matter) is never a good wedding-day look.